Inspired by others I thought I'd leave a few words for those that may still be interested. For what its worth I didn't really disappear, I merely ran out of things to say. I didn't have the energy to put into well researched topics like I used to and i grew tired of argueing with others over the same stupid things so I grew silent. Rest assured I still keep track of you all just to see what you are up to but it seems that my entries aren't the only ones that are few and far between.

So for the quick rundown, I had two separate surgeries on my leg (ankle and knee) which prolonged school for an added year. It was frustrating at the time but at this point in my life I've far exceeded any reasonable alotment for college. Neither was serious (broken bone and torn cartilage) but its distressing to someone that likes to maintain a certain level of activity, especially when the injuries are so close together. Even with a "full" recovery you still notice a difference.

Luckily for me I met a nice girl in the process and it allowed me enough time to eventually win her over. Thanks to her I've taken up horseback riding as well as had my first caribbean adventure. Although I am morally opposed to cruises I suspect there will be alot more travel in my future to look forward to. We finished school this past spring and she's continued on to grad school while I spent my summer suffering through the misery that is job hunting. On the verge of mowing lawns for a living, a surprise position fell into my lap a few weeks ago. I now work as a lab analyst for a new ethanol plant in upstate ny. Ironically its one I talked about here a few years ago when the project was first announced. I remember being so excited. If I only knew then....

I will admit I had lost faith in the working world and was ready to pursue a sustainable farming practice. Although I was afraid of my ability to start such a large undertaking I thought it was the only thing I would be happy doing. Given that I didn't have the capital to pay off loans, let alone invest in this new plan I decided to test the waters and see what the pretty piece of paper I was given could get me. After losing out on some choice positions I thought I had in the bag and my remaining options becoming less and less appealing I was nearly at a breaking point. Then out of nowhere I received an unsolicited call and within a week I was working. Granted at that point I would have taken anything (and I nearly did call a guy back about mowing lawns that morning).

To make a long story short (and none of my stories are ever short) I'm surprised at how well my job suits me and how much I enjoy it. I can honestly say I love my job and I really get into it every day. I never thought I'd be lucky enough to work in a lab or even do something I liked for a salary. At best it was a "one day" type delusion. Somehow I was handed my dream job right off the bat as if it was waiting for me all this time. I hope you all are finding what you're looking for too.

Keep in touch. I like hearing from you guys every now and then, even if its just a short blog entry.

-Nate

Single again, how novel.

Went sledding

Should have used a snowboard

Would have torn it up

Instead I broke my leg

 

*The End*

Wow, the months really fly by. Its late and I've slowed down enough to finally write a few things. I don't really have anything too profound today but I thought I could catch everyone up on what I've been doing all this time.

 

Book reading has been slow since the summer. I just have too many textbooks to read when schools in session. Its bothering me a bit too because some of the books I have on my reading list are more applicable to my goals than the classes I'm taking right now. The only exception being Conservation Biology, but to this point the class hasn't been much good for anything more than interesting case studies and field examples. If they'd only teach me the how's and why's I'd be much happier. I missed out on a class in restoration ecology based in hondurus this semester. It was down to me and another student but they managed to turn in there application an hour before I could. I was tremendously dissappointed but I suppose its for the best. Prepping for the trip would have been a major task and I'm already falling behind in Organic Chem. (which btw, making biodiesel isn't as interesting as I had hoped it would be).

 

This laptop sounds like its about to explode. I'll continue (here) tomorrow...

It might be time to write again. I have some things floating around in my head and I'm hoping I'll get motivation enough to write them down. Damn school sucks me dry. *sigh*

 

-Nate

For those that wondered, I am still here... I just haven't much to say.  I've been so active this summer that I just don't feel the need to write. For the first time in a long time I'm too happy just living life to slow down and think about it.

At least for now i'm just the quiet observer but I'm sure it won't be long until something gets me stirred into a frenzy. ;-)

-Nate

So I've finally reached a crossroads. Let me tell ya, what a crossroads it is. It seems Im standing in the middle of the three most important things in my life.... science, music, and family. Each one represents something very important to me and yet they are all in opposition to each other.

 

Science:  This is undoubtedly my logical side. Everything I believe in, the entire way of life that I want lies with the earth. I don't particularly like the way the world works or the way people live. I don't like the importance placed on wealth and posessions over people. I can't stand the seperation of community and families for the sake of lining the pockets of only a handful. This all stems from understanding ecology and the environment. The state of our society can't last much longer and yet everyone is oblivious. Somehow I've made myself an outcast because I won't embrace a life based on "climbing the ladder".  Its becoming clear that any chance I have of finding a companion and starting a family decreases dramatically the more I persue such an "alternative" lifestyle. 

 

Music: This is my emotional side. My desire for beauty and expression bring me back here time and again. There is no medium more powerful or more complete than music. To this day dancing still eludes me... but every single note can make my mind errupt and my heart sing. I can think of no greater joy for me than to write and sing and play. But alas, music represents the epitomy of a gluttonous lifestyle. The entire industry is built on extravagence and raping the poor. I simply can't come to terms with that, its never been my way.  Worse yet, while it does afford much more attention from the fair young ladies... the majority are hardly suitable for more than a hug and a handshake. Neither is it any way to raise a family.

 

Family:  Physical and social connections. I always knew I wanted a family... the whole nine yards.  As I go on its gotten more and more important to me.  Maybe its just the growing realization that I'm not on track. Out of the three, theres a bit more of a time frame involved with settling down.  I wasn't naive, I knew I wouldn't be ready for marriage until my mid twenties and I was right. I navigated to this point perfectly... granted my arrival is lacking one rather key component but i'm ready right? With the way women complain I always thought that was the hardest part. Now i'm starting to think I got on the wrong boat. =P

Its not like I don't have choices... I listed them above. The problem is that niether one is likely to bring me back to this point and I've not resolved to let my hopes for a meaningful relationship and a loving family go....

 

 

Stuck in the middle of a three way tug of war.

 

 

Yesterday shaped who we are, tomorrow decides who we become. It's today that makes yesterday worth living and tomorrow worth fighting for.

 

I'm greatful for all three.

Dustball Aostrow Jen 

 

I see this over and over again. Whats going on??

 

Alright, let me explain. Anytime someone visits my blog (which really isn't that frequent) I'm rather curious what brought them here. The truth is I rarely post and until recently I only posted within a small area of interest. When checking up on visitors I had hoped it may lead me to people of similar interest or introduce me to environmental blogs I'd yet to discover.  I have my circle of friends and extended acquaintances that come by from time to time but I'll be damned if 50% of the people i don't recognize have only three friends... Dustball Austrow and Jen. Some don't even have a profile or a single entry.... but they have three friends. =P

 

Whats going on here, can someone shed some light??? Thats just seems too odd to me.

I was out in Ohio this past weekend (dreadfully horrid place) and on the way home I stopped at my brothers house. He happened to mention a new (new-er) JFK cd and I couldn't help but sample it online. Oddly enough they are from Ohio and first song that really caught my attention was this one. I liked it quite a bit. =)

 

July For Kings Nostalgia "One By One"

http://www.julyforkings.com/music/nostalgia/onebyone.mp3

Now my dead end street
is a culdesac
for every acre gone
there's five new cadalacs
i know i'm too young to get so damn strung out by all that
but all our small town stores
have got new big name signs
and the sky gets tangled in new telephone lines
i dial three more numbers
for the same old friends of mine

don't go changing on me
don't go rearranging
don't go changing on me now

how long
'til every single star is gone?
one by one
they leave you when your day is done

all these pop star stories
on my TV screen
who slept with who and where and why
it wasn't what it seemed
i listened all day
but still the radio played the same three things

don't go changing on me
don't go rearranging
don't go changing on me now

how long
'til every single star is gone?
one by one
they leave you when your day is done

wait!
hold up the fading sky
it's hard to feel real
with all this light in your eyes
wait!
hold up a fading star
one by one i wonder where they are

how long
'til every single star is gone?
one by one
they leave you when your day is done
....